‘May Feelings’ acrylic on canvas about 4 x 5 feet May 2012
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A ‘Red Line’ series is falling into place. It started over a year ago with this painting.
I was awake and wanted to paint. It was 2:00 in the morning. This happened during a workshop taught by Leigh Hyams http://www.artsreal.com/. at Mountain Home Ranch in Calistoga, California. I put some warm clothes on, took my flashlight and went down to the studio. Turning on the lights I brought out a large roll of pre-gessoed canvas, cut off a piece and left it on the floor. I looked and looked, sat by it and walked around it. What am I going to paint? What is in you? Who are you? What do you want to paint about? What are your true feelings inside you. What have been your true feelings? What have you been dealing with? Ah ha! with that question I knew it was easy. I had just been diagnosed with throat cancer. How did I feel about that? What was inside me ? Not what had I been looking at in the real world. So I put some limits on my painting, no familiar shapes or colors. The colors had to all come from within. The painting had to express how I felt about having cancer in me now. What color were my cancer feelings? They sure as hell weren’t pinks, peaches and cream, these colors being my familiar palette. I mixed up a mess of colors and started to paint. I painted with my brushes, with a palette knife, my hands. I didn’t stop until I was done. The painting needed something. I took a tube of red paint and made a red line. The painting was finished. I tacked it up on the wall and walked back up the road to my room as the morning light filled the outside space.
‘Rolled’ acrylic on canvas 4 x 5 feet October 2012
The cancer is gone. New feelings come with new experiences.